Quote – “Spotlight”

“Being sick, being ill, being in pain; they have a certain spotlight on themselves. They put a spotlight on the person or people you know, especially when it comes to friends, family, and coworkers. You have empathy for them; you feel bad that they are going through what they are. You go out of your way to make sure they’re alright and check on them the following days.

But then something strange happens. When something happens with you, no one seems to notice, or worse, seems to care. Even that person you did your due diligence to care after seems preoccupied with trivial things. Are you suddenly not important, or were you never? Would it then just be better to lie and say everything is fine when you’re really not? Should you stop worrying over someone who becomes ill around you or has a reoccurrence of something they’ve always had?

I want to say ‘yes, put the spotlight back on them. What I don’t know though, is if it’s because it’s the nice thing to do or because when you fall more ill, they’ll feel terrible for not paying you more attention.”

I love my sister, I really do… but sometimes I wished she would take better care of herself. Well, I wish that all the time, but not always for her own benefit. When I’m in a lot of pain, like I am right now, there always seems to be something wrong with her. Can I not, for once, be the one who can be taken care of?

Thank goodness I have a boyfriend (Simon) who actually give a damn. Otherwise, I would be going through this on my own… yet again.


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