[Feeling Impatient…Crisis of Writing Faith?]

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I’m feeling impatient with myself.

It’s not really a new feeling towards myself, but it’s definitely something I wish I didn’t feel… Or at least not feel it so intensely.

I have lists, some written down and some floating around in my head, that literally keep my awake at night. They also keep me from having a restful night’s sleep, which makes things worse…

I have so many ideas I want to get down on paper and on my laptop, but I feel limited when I sit down to do so. I wouldn’t definite it as writer’s block because I’ve experienced that before, and this isn’t it.

I feel as though I’m crumbling in on myself when it comes to my writing. I don’t want to describe it as dark and due to potential depression or anxiety but… it’s striking fear of failure.

I guess all I can do is try to find some sort of confidence in myself and trust I know even an inkling of what I’m attempting to accomplish.

I hate trying to be optimistic for myself. I was to be optimistic when it comes to me but it’s extremely tiring. I don’t feel fake saying it to my friends and family who I know, I KNOW, can be so amazing, because I do believe it… I just have difficulties saying it to myself and believing it.

And yes, Fact #125 is something I have been doing for years…

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